WHAT IS THE SLOPPY LOPPET?
Fresh out of hibernation, the Sloppy Loppet is back for round two! This tipsy winter field day is designed to remind the North-dwelling populace that winter is a game, and we're here to win. Upon the snowy grounds of Como Dockside in St. Paul, Minnesota, a course of non-skiing challenges with a boozy bent will put your cold-weather mettle and ability to stay upright to the test. With friendly competition, prizes, and enough drink specials to take down a Snow Beast, we're making the best of the season before it gets the best of us.
Sloppeteers traverse the course in heats of six, but compete individually. The front runners from each heat advance to the quick elimination semi-final, which determines who goes head to head in the ultimate Sloppy Showdown.
Tug 'n' Chug
Our lazy person version of the biathlon. In sum: shoot at tallboy targets with Nerf guns. The person to knock the most down in the allotted amount of time wins.
Like the three-legged races of field day yore, but on a shared ski thing. Unlike three-legged races of yore, there's a shotski in the middle.
A hybrid of beer pong and Bozo Buckets, in which you face off with another person to get your balls into buckets made of ice.
A creative challenge that involves making a snowman based on a prompt and our arbitrary judgment determines the winner.
Balance a "snowball" on a beer can while weaving between ski poles. If the snowball is dropped, you have to start over. Quickest time wins.
What's a loppet?
Traditionally, a loppet is a long distance cross-country skiing event, like the Birkebeiner, or the Twin Cities' own City of Lakes Loppet . We're going with the broader definition which includes any athletic event occurring across varied terrain, "athletic" being very loosely interpreted. (Purists will tell you it's actually pronounced LOH-pet, but in true Upper Midwestern fashion, we prefer our phonetics to be the way god intended, å la EYE-talian, bayg, ruhf, etc.)
Is there skiing involved?
No actual skiing this time -- we're trying something new this year to level the playing field for people who might have lingering PTSD from that one time they tried to use their aunt's Nordic Track. However, most of the challenges involve elements of that beloved Scandi sport, so you'll get your fix with far less struggle.
What's included with my ticket?
Aside from the chance to say you conquered the cold, the best craft beers from local maestros Indeed Brewing and Summit will be a-flowing, and Como Dockside will be serving up Two Gingers Hot Toddies to keep you toasty. For folks who are coming from MSP/West Metro, we'll have a bus to haul your ass from Pat's Tap in South Minneapolis all the way to exotic St. Paul because we want you to be responsibly sloppy. PLUS, awards and prize booty, y'all!
IS THIS A KID FRIENDLY EVENT?
We believe the children are our future, but for the time being, the Sloppy Loppet is exclusive to 21+ folks only. A valid I.D. is required at check-in.
DO I HAVE TO DRINK TO PARTICIPATE?
We can substitute H2O for the drink-infused challenges. Just try not to judge the rest of us.
What should I wear?
Whatever makes your fire burn, but do take note that the Best Suited prize goes to the best retro snowsuit ensemble. The perfect marriage of form and function, we like to think the Tundra Tuxedo never went out of style.
Will there be food?
We definitely recommend fueling up beforehand to help soak up the fun later. Should you get peckish throughout the day, Como Dockside’s menu of New Orleans-inspired po’boys and other fixins will keep a body sated.
What if it's really cold?
Uh oh, did you move here after reading a listicle that said the Twin Cities are the best places to live in the nation? Because whomever wrote that clearly did not experience The Great Polar Vortex of '14, in which we held the inaugural Sloppy Loppet. For real though, you'll be moving throughout the day — you'll forget to be cold! Plus, drinking raises your body temp says science. And if you're really not feeling it, sweet, sweet heat is but steps away.
What if there's no snow?
Ah, the many moods of Midwest weather. Should this unlikely scenario come to pass, we have a contingency plan that's just as good as the original, so it will be all systems go.
I’m not very good at games. What if I suck?
The goal of the Sloppy Loppet isn’t victory for the sake of being victorious. It’s for throwing two middle fingers in the air and saying, “You see that Old Man Winter? You can't break us!" Who cares if you don’t make it to the big time? We’re showing the Snow Beast who’s boss.